The Laowai Conundrum

Today, I am home sick, but I can't sleep because I feel so yucky. I decided to write something to try to convey what I experience daily. I have found that I, as a Laowai (foreigner), seem to be quite a conundrum for the Chinese who live in my community.

I live in a Chinese compound with maybe ten other foreigners. Justin and I drive a scooter, and we do not have a car or driver. Our scooter is second-hand and is pretty beat up. Yesterday, as I was traveling, I noticed a lot of people staring at me, which is not uncommon. Here is what happened...

I left home to go to dance rehearsal and it was raining. I grabbed a towel to wipe off my scooter seat and a raincoat. I then began to drive to practice. As I was driving, I heard those passing by me making comments about me driving in the rain on my scooter. I arrived at my destination and was fine.

Later, Justin and I were riding home from youth, in the rain, and we decided to grab a pizza to take home. We went to the pizza place to make an order, and they reminded me that they deliver. I got my rather large pizza box and rode on the back of the scooter with Justin driving. As we were driving home, we realized the scooter was nearly dead, so I would have to walk the rest of the way.

As we stopped and I got off, there was more staring and comments by people passing by. Justin then drove the rest of the way home, and I walked in the rain back home with the pizza box. I felt like, in that moment, that I was the center of everyone's attention as I walked. There was not one person I passed that did not take a long hard look at me. I was thankful when I returned home to the privacy of my apartment.

So, here is why this story is part of the "Laowai Conundrum." There is a general perception in China that every foreigner has tons of money. This is not really the case, because most foreigners who live here have their HUGE homes and drivers paid for by their companies. Therefore, it is all just a misunderstanding. Don't get me wrong, most foreigners here are well off, but they are not as rich as is perceived.

We clearly do not have a lot of money, which is confusing in its self for the community we live in. Most people do not understand why we live in the apartment that we do, why we drive a scooter, and why we live average lifestyles. All of the comments about me driving in my scooter in the rain generate from the fact that it is very uncommon to see a foreigner on a scooter in the rain. Generally, they would take a taxi, or have a driver.

It is also very odd that we do not take advantage of delivery services, because even a lot of Chinese have food delivered. It just seems completely odd that we would pick up our food and take it home ourselves. Also, for some reason, it is rare that a scooter battery dies on someone. I NEVER see anyone pushing their scooter because it died. Because these things are even uncommon for an average Chinese person, we look more different in these circumstances.

With all this being said, it is REALLY strange to see a foreigner on foot, in the rain, carrying a box of pizza home...

I tell you all of this to just give you an image of how different life is for us here. We love China and we have great friends here. The culture is just very different, and there are some huge misconceptions about foreigners. I hope that in my time here, I can help my friends in China to see that we are a lot the same, and not so different.

From House to Home

Hello All,

The month of March was quite eventful for us. At the beginning of the month, we moved out of our old apartment following the Chinese New Year holiday. We moved with our friends John and Megan, to an apartment in the same compound, but one building over. Though it was not a huge change in location, it was a huge change in our living situation.

Our new apartment has 3 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms (we have a room dedicated to all of the studio equipment!!). It has been fully remodeled and has all new appliances. The kitchen is all new and beautiful. We have a nice balcony and a space for laundry, which sure beats a porch flooded by the washing machine. It is truly a step up for us and has helped relieve some of the stress of living in a different country. We have truly been blessed by God to have this opportunity of a new and wonderful home.

Our new Living Room with some decor.

Our bedroom, with one yellow wall painted and a TV, and our bathroom.

Red Kitchen, Studio Room, Second Bathroom (I did not photo John and Megan's room)

In the midst of moving here in Shanghai, we were also searching for new tenants for our house in the US. We were very behind on payments and were in a bad situation, and desperately needed to take steps to improve our circumstances. After a few weeks of screening tenants and getting our house cleaned up, our parents helped hold an Open House for us. With their guidance and discernment, we were able to find a new tenant.

The most awesome part of it all is that she is a Christian and is very excited about the work we are doing here. She has already shown great care and concern for our home and has even helped us with having the carpet replaced. We feel confident that she is the right person to live in our home and that she will take care of it for us.

We are so thankful for all of God's blessings as we have persevered through trials of our own. We are thankful for all of your prayers and support as we live so far and communicate quite infrequently. We are grateful for how we have grown through all of our experiences and excited about what lies ahead.

With Love,
The Ures

The shadow proves the sunshine...

Justin and I decided to watch a documentary titled "Fading West" by Switchfoot last weekend. It was a really inspiring story and made me think a lot. I actually have been in a contemplative state for a little while, and I am now taking the time to sit down and write out a bit of our story over the last few months and where we are in this journey we are on.

When I was browsing alone on YouTube watching surfing videos (strange, I know, but a slight obsession of mine), I came across this video advertising for the "Fading West" documentary. I was reminded of the song "The Shadow Proves The Sunshine" by Switchfoot, and I thought about how the lyrics were so appropriate for the journey Justin and I have been on together since we got married.

Sunshine, won't you be my mother?

Sunshine, come and help me sing

My heart is darker than these oceans

My heart is frozen underneath

We Are

Dry eyes in the pouring rain while

The shadow proves the sunshine

Two scared little runaways

Hold fast till the break of daylight when

The shadow proves the sunshine

Crooked souls trying to stay up straight

Oh Lord, why did you forsake me?

Oh Lord, don't be far away (away)

Storm clouds gathering beside me

Please Lord, don't look the other way

We Are

Crooked souls trying to stay up straight

Dry eyes in the pouring rain while

The shadow proves the sunshine

Two scared little runaways

Hold fast till the break of daylight when

The shadow proves the sunshine

When we embarked on this adventure of marriage, we really had NO idea what we were getting into. Justin was happy with me doing missions on my own short term, while he pursued his dreams of studio success. We tried to buy a house before our wedding, but were unable to. We were helping with a church plant in Brandon while we were engaged and then decided to help with another one just before our wedding in New Port Richey. We wanted so badly to live close to our church, but we were unable to because of work and because we could not find a house. We settled for an apartment in Tampa, and made treks in all directions to make our lives work.

In the spring after we got married, I stopped working with the missions organization I was with because of finances. Then, in the summer, we began the house search again after moving in with Justin's parents. After a long struggle, we got a house and were getting ready to move in. Then, everything changed, we were suddenly given the opportunity to come to China in the new year, to try something for six months. We moved into our house, lived there for three months, found tenants, and moved to China.

We were not met without opposition, because no one understood why we would make such a rash decision. For both of us, it was a perfect solution. Justin could still do his studio work while I pursued my dreams of doing work in another country. We were happy to quit dead end jobs without meaning and run to greater horizons. We could not answer the questions: What will you be doing there? Are you going to be working? Where will you live? How will you communicate?

We just did not have the answers. We still do not have all the answers.

This is where the shadow comes in. Everything here is much different than we ever pictured. I did not get a job at an international school. It is very difficult to get a teaching job here without a teaching degree and many years of experience. Justin did not get huge opportunities to work in the music industry. It just does not work like that here.

Our situation with our house dramatically deteriorated as well. We are currently in the process of evicting tenants and are looking for new ones. We are behind on mortgage payments. We have thankfully been able to make payments on everything else at home. We have literally had to wait on the Lord for every penny. Which is a constant battle within my control freak soul.

We have questioned God on what our purpose is: Why did you bring us to China? What do you want us to do? Do you really want us here? Why is all of this happening?

His answer to us... "Just trust me."

So, here comes the sunshine!

Justin and I have an awesome church community here. We are both in discipleship groups and are actively participating in a community of believers that come along side us, support us, and encourage us. We are both able to serve in multiple areas of our church and work within our areas of strength. We have grown together as a couple in Christ so much. We study scripture together and pray together. We have no choice but to lean on God and take each step alongside him. We have gained so much perspective on our purpose as a couple and what God desires of us.

At home, in our crazy lives, in our comfort zones, this would have NEVER happened. God got our attention!

We are so thankful for the support of our parents in this insane journey. We are thankful to our faithful friends, John and Megan, who put up with us in insanely small quarters (we are upgrading soon!). We are thankful for our church in the US and here in China for being such awesome brothers and sisters in Christ.

We ask that you PLEASE pray for us. For our work here. For our journey in our relationship with Christ. For our house and how to move forward.

We would love to set up a communication through email with those of you who would like it. My email is blythe.ure@gmail.com.

We are also needing some physical support. We need to take care of our house and need help moving forward. We need to find tenants, so if you have any advice or know of someone needing a home, please contact me. Also, if you are able to make a financial donation on our behalf to help with our US home, please contact me.

We love you all so much, and miss our US family and friends!

Happy Valentine's Day!

Our First Christmas in China

Hello Everyone!

I know you are thinking, isn't it a little late to be talking about Christmas? To be honest, it is. However, Justin and I had a feeling this year that Christmas came and went, and we missed it. With that being said, our Christmas time was very special and we spent it in a way we never have before. We went to Sancun, Yunnan to help with a documentary about the work being done there.

We flew into Kunming, stayed the night, and took a 7 hour drive into the mountains to Sancun. We stayed in a hotel room with a bed, t.v., and bathroom. It was a unique experience for us, because neither Justin or I had stayed in a room with a squatty potty and only a shower head above it to shower with. We also had no heat or hot water in very cold weather. We learned to adapt quickly, but not without difficulty.

Our Hotel the Ritz Carlton (it was really called that!)

Our Bathroom

The cute pig next to our hotel

The main job of the team with us was to go help at the school in Yizu Village. It was previously a rundown building with only a few classes. In the last year, they have built a three story building and have taken on a lot more students. The kids all come from farming families and live pretty tough lives. They have very little hope, because they do not think that they will ever leave their hometown. For the children, the team had planned a couple of days of classes, a special Christmas carnival involving games, prizes, and some new clothes, and a Christmas performance.

School from above

Our welcoming committee (the whole school sang to us)

The new building

Justin and I helped with a production team that was recording a documentary about the area and the work being done there. Justin was recording all of the sound and I helped with various jobs, especially taking pictures. We had an awesome time seeing the whole team work together and love on the community. We really enjoyed making some new Chinese friends, too, named Qi, Bing Jie, and Lynn, who were on the production team. We will continue to meet up with them in Shanghai now.

Justin ans Qi taking a break

One day, we went to a nursing home in the area where we were working. I have never been comfortable in that setting, but it was nice, because we did a program for the elderly outside. It was awesome because some of the kids from the school came along to help lead songs for the elderly. For just a moment, I was reminded of my grandmother and how much I missed her. My sadness was quickly wiped away though by the silliest image. I encountered the largest pig I have ever seen. It's head came up past Justin's waist.

The largest pig I have EVER seen

The ladies at the home playing a game

We also had the privilege of visiting a village WAY up in the mountains. It took quite a while to get there, but the view was beautiful and the time of day was perfect to see everything. I have to say, that the conditions were not as bad as I have seen in the past, because the houses were structurally sound and their was a system of drainage. I found out, though, that the government has done a lot of projects to help build up villages and the roads leading to them.

They were cornered...

Overall, our Christmas trip was incredible. Justin and I decided to go about a week before the trip, and were blessed by a friend of ours who paid our expenses. We really were hesitant about going because we just wanted to celebrate Christmas like usual. Nevertheless, we were very happy that we decided to go, because it helped us refocus, remember our purpose, and embrace the challenges ahead.

I have so much more to share with you. My silence has been a result of lots of learning through challenges. I hope to have time and the words to share it all with you soon.

P.S.: If you want to see all of the pics from my trip look here: http://www.flickr.com/photos/96566563@N03/sets/72157639431915103/

Gratefulness and Thanksgiving

Hello!
The past few months have been a whirlwind of busyness and ministry. I would be a complete liar if I said I did not have points of complete exhaustion and discouragement. There have honestly been many trials for us, including situations from home, pollution, and other struggles here. However, we continue to learn repeatedly that God is in charge of our steps and he will make a way for us as we submit to his will.

With that being said, we have SO many things to be thankful for. So here are the "Top Ten Things We Are Thankful":

1. I had the awesome opportunity of visiting Qingdao, China at the beginning of October. It is a city by the ocean in China north of Shanghai, which was a German colony. It is the home of the famous Tsingtao brewery and the center of lots of German and Chinese culture. I traveled with friends from our church and stayed with them in two hostels there. This was my first "real" travel experience in China, and I got to meet some cool people along the way. We went to the beach and the mountains. I even ate a locust!

2. Halloween is mostly celebrated in the United States. Here in China it is a growing holiday. We decided to have a party because we like to dress up and pass out candy. Chinese students from our school came and trick-or-treated at our door, because their parents wanted them to have the experience. It was so much fun!

3. We made another trip to Hong Kong because we had to. However, the timing of the trip landed right before our anniversary. We decided that we would take advantage of the required trip to celebrate our 2nd Anniversary. We stayed at a retreat center. It was VERY relaxing and some of our friends blessed us so that we could enjoy the time there.

4. We were given the opportunity to go to GLS Shanghai. This is a Global Leadership Summit hosted by Willow Creek in the US. They host it and record all of the speakers. Then in November, they visit Shanghai and play all the videos and host a conference here. It was an awesome experience to hear from influential people in business and ministry. I also went to the Youth event at the last minute. We had a great time and great conversations with the Youth about being leaders in their place and time now.

5. Our youth take part in an event called "Impact Shanghai." It is a event where the youth have the opportunity to learn to love and serve Shanghai. We got to pass out winter supplies and shoes. We also got to know the community just out our back door. It was super interesting and inspiring.

6. Our awesome friends, the Wests, are from Texas. They invited us to their house for Thanksgiving dinner. This came just at the time that we needed it. For just a little bit, when we were feeling homesick, we got the opportunity to feel right at home. We experienced Southern hospitality and got to eat delicious food!

7. One of the students who is a part of our youth ministry is a dancer. She performed in the second half of The Nutcracker at one of the local schools. It was a great performance and was enjoyable to carry on a Christmastime tradition.

8. We started up a Youth Dance Group here for our church. From October to December, I held rehearsals with three girls with various backgrounds in dance. They did their first performance for the church Christmas performance. It was beautiful and an awesome was to get back into dance.

9. Our Youth had a Christmas Party. I offered to do a photo booth for it. It was so much fun and I think the youth enjoyed it too!

10. A friend of ours from Church asked Justin to help in recording a documentary over the Christmas holiday in Sancun, China. He was very hesitant at first and definitely did not want to spend Christmas without me. Thanks to our friend's generosity, we had an awesome opportunity to visit another part of China, help others, and be a part of something that could change the future of this area.

We have clearly had so many things to be thankful for. I want to share our experience in Sancun more with you as well. Trying to catch up on some rest now, and all sorts of other things!

Happy New Year to all our friends and loved ones!!

Saying Goodbye... From Across the Globe

I think that this week has been one of the hardest weeks of my life. I am not incredibly busy because it is a national holiday and I even spent some time in Qingdao with friends. However, since I have been back in Shanghai and spending time in my apartment, I have had a lot of time to think. You may or may not know that my grandma passed away last Friday. She and I were very close and it has taken a toll on me being so far from home. In the last couple of days, I have been sifting through many memories of her and my grandfather (who we lost over ten years ago). I have decided that I need write her a letter to say goodbye in my own way.

Dear Grandma,

I feel like I have been preparing myself for this moment since you got sick again almost three years ago. I remember that you were not feeling well for days and I did everything to try to get you to eat. On Christmas Eve, you went into the hospital and then ended up in the ICU. Justin had planned to propose to me on New Year’s Eve, but we almost cancelled our trip, because we were not sure you were going to make it. You were so happy when we went and returned, because you got to see my ring from your hospital bed in the ICU. Your smile was the best thing I have ever seen.

You came through that trial, but not without hardship, because it was then that we found out your cancer had returned. I just knew after that, it was only a matter of time. As you bravely fought that battle, I did what I could to help you. I spent my work lunches at your house, took you to a few appointments that I was terrified of, and drove you around when you needed it.

I saw you getting weaker as time passed and my heart began to break. I remember talking on the phone with you every day when I had a chance. One day you asked me if you should continue your treatments. I told you that I could not make that decision for you. I just said that you had to decide how you wanted to spend the rest of your life, fighting or enjoying the time you had left.

Soon after, you had some complications and had to move out of your house. Such a sad step in all of our lives, because so many memories were made there. I could not visit you quite as often and you began to forget a lot of what I told you. That really was the beginning of the end and there is not much more to be said about it. Justin and I prayerfully considered coming to China and you supported us as much as you could. However, I would like to spend some time reliving the happy memories I have of you to say thank you and a proper goodbye.

When I was little, I remember you and Grandpa lived close to my preschool and would pick me up every day. I loved the hours spent at your house while my parents worked just being spoiled by you. You even let us live with you a while, when we needed to find a home, and helped take care of us. I also remember spending countless hours watching Nickelodeon and Disney at your house (we did not have cable), playing in the sprinkler in the back yard, and picking exactly what I wanted Grandpa to cook for breakfast. I still talk about these times with friends like I am a kid.

The holidays at your house are the best memories I will ever have. Our family came together for Thanksgiving and Christmas and spent a full day together there. We would eat the best meals from the hearts of family members. We played sports together, played games together, and the grandkids ALWAYS made a fort in the attic with booby traps. You never complained about the mess or the craziness. You were always just happy to have us there and made us feel loved.

As I got older, I remember getting picked up from middle school on half days by you and Grandpa. We always stopped and ate at Wendy’s for lunch. It was your favorite. You would take me out and I always knew you would buy me something if I asked for it. The time was so special to you that it did not even matter. You always attended EVERY performance I was in and saved the program. I know that to you, I was the only star on stage.

After Grandpa passed away, I got to know you even more. You became such a strong woman and pressed on without the love of your life. I cannot imagine how you felt in that time. You found out you had Cancer the first time, not to far after that. I remember waiting in the hospital and getting the news just before leaving for Honduras on a mission trip.

You were always such a strong example in your spiritual life. Up until you were no longer healthy enough to participate, you served on the board at your church and in many committees. You always had your church praying for my mission work and any time I saw someone from your church, you made sure they knew I was the “missionary.” Every trip, before I left, you made sure to slip me a check so I had what I needed for my trip. You literally were one of my biggest supporters.

You supported me in all aspects of my life though. When I was struggling to get my driver’s license, you were so concerned. You called me so many times to come over and take you places, so I could practice. One time, when we drove to Bed, Bath and Beyond, your favorite place with the 20% off coupon (that you always used on me), we had a near death experience. I pulled out of the parking lot across lanes of traffic and there was no one coming. However, somehow in a split second, there was a car that I apparently cut-off, running us off the road. They were screaming profanities and putting up the middle finger at us. You just hollered back at them and told me not to worry about it. You always had a fighter’s spirit.

You also were so excited to help with my wedding, even though you were sick. You spoke to the board at your church so we could have the wedding there. You made sure they would not charge too much and arranged a meeting for us with the pastor. In the days leading up to the wedding, you told me they were waxing the floors for us and you made sure NOTHING would interfere with my big day. You worried and worried about your dress for the wedding and did not think it matched. I assured you it was perfect. You walked in my wedding and carried on with John, our friend who walked you down the aisle. You were so proud to have it at your church and to be there for my wedding. I am thankful you could be there.

My most precious memories center on your most favorite time of the year though. I think it had something to do with your birthday! You would plan with me to come over and lug the twenty boxes of Christmas decorations down from your attic. We then would spend nearly two days unpacking them and decorating. I always had to start by constructing the fake tree, that I had to convince you was worth it. Then, you would unpack all the ornaments that your children and grandchildren had made or given you, while I hung the lights. After I got all the lights on the tree you would always insist it needed more, so I would add more. We would then decide on the theme for the tree, red, green, or gold, because you loved the fancy trees you saw on T.V. Sometimes we had to stop and go buy ribbon or something to make it look better.

We finally hung all of the ornaments, and then would find more that we had to make fit. It was such a beautiful tree filled with love and memories. I also helped with all of the other decorations. My favorite was the ice skaters operated by a fan with candles. While we decorated, you always played the Gene Autry Christmas album on your record player and sang along with your beautiful voice. I really believe you were the happiest in those moments.

I literally could go on forever, but I really think you know how much I love you. I just needed to put it in writing for my own good and to share it with others. You have been such an inspiration to me in my life with your strong heart and stubborn spirit. I will always remember you and how you loved me. I look forward to dancing with you and Grandpa in heaven someday; I just hope it is soon.

I love you Grandma! Goodbye.

Family :)

At the Wedding

Christmas day in the hospital

A red year...

Walking in my cousin's wedding

Feeding a giraffe at Giraffe Ranch

First Day of School Preparations

As you may or may have not read, tomorrow is my first day working at Zooligans, and international Kindergarten. Last week I spent lots of hours at the school with my friend Katie, and we worked on cleaning up the school, organizing, and preparing for the upcoming week. My class is primarily downstairs, so I decided to work on the downstairs area.

When I arrived, toys were haphazardly placed here and there with no purpose. If you know me well, you know that this does not suit me at all. Katie helped me move stuff around and create centers. Then she helped me open up some cabinets in the reading center, decorate them, and put books on them. After that, I made my own calendar, and created my "Circle Time" area. I also came up with decorations for my centers and a board to place kids in centers. I am very pleased with the result and took lots of pictures to share my work with you.

I am super happy with the end result. I was really excited when the Mandarin co-teachers made paper swans to help decorate!

Circle Time with my handmade calendar and Helper Owl using some of the kids old artwork.

Center assignment board with kids old artwork

I made a new friend who was keeping me company in the process. She spoke Chinese to me for quite a while, and I only understood about a fourth of what she said.

I also helped clean up one of the resource rooms, which was quite a mess. Now it is organized and usable.

 Finally, I had time to prep some arts and crafts, including Alli the Alligator, for our letter of the week, A.

I forgot to mention that although my week was VERY successful, I panicked on Thursday. I went to pull up my lesson plans and all of the items I needed to print, and I had somehow deleted the folder. I spent the whole day restoring the files...

I think I am as prepared as I can be for the week. I am slightly nervous, because I have not worked in a full preschool classroom for a while. VERY excited to meet kiddos and parents tomorrow and to begin the adventure!